You say things that should comfort me and maybe would if things were different. But you've said a lot of things... And I should have learned sooner not to trust you, not to believe you.
It just hurts to think about at all. Sometimes I can push you to the back of my mind for a bit, and it's nice. But you're never gone... And the simplest things will bring you screaming back to the center of my brain. And then it overwhelms me. I try to push you back again, but I can't. You are too strong for me. I am so weak...
The things you said, all those promises, they mock me. They laugh at me for falling for it, again and again and again. The tears start to flow. I used to never cry. Not about my own life anyway. Always in movies and books, but about me? About a BOY? Never. And those rare times I did, it was always in private. Like a secret no one could ever know. But now I can't hold back in front of anyone. Your own brother saw me lose it. It's humiliating.
How did you do this to me? Why did you do this to me... I've never been this way, not even with him. I never thought anyone could ever hurt me as much as he did - let alone more - but I guess I can thank you for proving that wrong! That is a damn impressive accomplishment.
I guess I was just too busy protecting you to protect myself. Too busy falling more and more in love with you to notice you falling out of love with me. I wish I hadn't been so blind.
I put up walls and I act tough, but you saw right through it. I wonder what you were thinking? "Ohh this girl pretends to be tough, but she's obviously not. She has all these walls up that she thinks can protect her. How absurd. *lightbulb* I have an idea! Wouldn't it be fun to climb them, make her believe in me, and then knock them down and walk away? She won't have any walls left to protect her and I'll be gone. No more tough act. She will have surrendered her heart by then and I shall take it as my prize. Yes, this should be fun." I imagine that's something how it must have gone.
Well sir, you had your audience believing! Believing like they never had. Take a bow for a job well done. Very convincing act. I would tip you, but I really don't have anything left to give. Did you have fun? I sure hope so. I wouldn't want this to have been in vain...
I really enjoyed the show when I thought I was in the rest of the play, but then I realized I was just in one scene. Comedic relief perhaps? Something like that. Well I hope they're laughing. I hope you're laughing. I hope I did my job as well as you did. Standing ovation!
No one has ever made me feel beautiful or like I was worth something like you. I never believed them before. Aren't you supposed to get smarter as you go along? Obviously I didn't. Or maybe you are just extremely talented.
You sanded off my edges. Now I'm left alone and vulnerable... All my walls knocked down and no one to protect me. Shot down lower even than before. How naive of me to believe you, to believe I was beautiful and worth something. The voices in my head chime in; "Of course you're not, silly girl. We've told you all along. Why would you ever listen to him? We told you not to believe him. Stupid girl. Now do you wish you would have listened to us? Don't let anyone tell you you are beautiful. Don't let anyone make you think you have a purpose. You don't. Naive little child." As the tears roll down I nod my head and silently swear to myself to never let this happen again. I surrender to the voices.
Well I'll tell you what, gig's up. I figured it out! I'm done. I'm not sticking around anymore, so stop trying. I'm done being your comedic relief... I wish you wouldn't act like I'm stupid. I know I was, but I finally caught on. I realize it took me long enough - but now that I have - I'm not falling for it anymore. So you can just stop pretending... Your audience is no longer listening.
This scene is over. It was nice to meet the rest of the cast and there are memories I will always cherish from our scene. But I don't think I can stay to watch the ending, because there are also scars that will never go away from it.
So my dear, this is where we both start our next scenes. Like intersecting lines. To cross paths once, but never again meet. I hope the rest of your play is filled with much laughter and happiness. And I hope it ends well, something like a fairy tale. Goodbye my darling.
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